Sunday, August 28, 2011

the time has come

the time has come.
this will be my last night in Seoul.
but i had spent it wisely. surrounded with happy people. for the past few days, i had filled my time with laughter and tears. i went to the places i love the most and leave half of my heart there. the places will remember me, i hope. but i know that this is not a goodbye. this nice place will always has a spot right in my heart. i love you, Korea and all the lovely people. you will be missed. for sure.

ps/ Korea, you will remember me, will you?

love always,
ruhil nadiah

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

take it off

this is what happen when you don't read and you don't know but you act like you know everything. this program has been one of the most popular show in Korea. people, here and there, show their talents in so many ways. sometimes, in the most embarrassing and ridiculous ways. the controversial issue in this episode ( i haven't watch it live, though) has been circulating on the web. it portrayed Islam and Arab people in the most disturbing ways. i won't say more, you can watch and judge it yourself.

related to this issue, i have experienced somewhat similar perceptions for the past three years living in Korea. as a woman wearing hijab, i got so many perplexing and funny questions from Koreans; professors, friends, and even strangers. some of the questions are acceptable and some are... errr.. what should i say.. very provoking. i thank Allah for the patience He gave me explaining on why hijab is my choice. below are some of the questions and statements about my hijab:

1. isn't it hot? take it off, it's depressing.
my answer: yes, it's hot but i can handle it and i'm used to it, thank you. 
my heart: PLEASE, you don't have to feel depress for me. 

2. it's such a waste, you will look better without it. take it off.
my answer: i don't think it's a waste and i'm OKAY with it. i don't dress to impress people.
my heart: i want to look better for Allah during the Judgment Day and definitely not for you.

3. i don't think you have to wear it here, it's not like you are in Malaysia or anything. that's why you don't have a lot of Korean friends. they are scared of your image. (this statement was made by one of my ex-classmate. she's making a fool of herself)
my answer: i have to wear it and i like to wear it because of Islam. i didn't come here to make a lot of friends and i don't care if they are scared of my image. 
my heart: what is wrong with you? such a shame, you are doing you doctorate yet you are still amazingly dumb.

4. taxi driver: are you Muslim?
    me: yes, i am.
    taxi driver: i heard that when women Muslims marry they have to obey their husband and they will get beaten. so are you gonna be one of them? 
    me: what???????????????????????????????????????????
my heart: speechless. 

5.  i heard that Muslim women cannot have education and talk to other people (man), is it true?
my answer: errr.. i'm doing my masters now and obviously, i'm talking to you.
*one of the funny questions, but this man was honest. after that i explain to him a little bit about Islam.

6. "you don't believe in Jesus, you go to hell!!" 
this is not fictional or make-believe incident. happened to me few years ago while i'm in the train. this crazy man, came to me and said that and he held my shoulder hard and yelling at me. everybody in the train was so shocked and nobody did anything. it was very rude, ugly and disrespectful. i could have lost my patience and punch his nose but that would be too much. i wish i did. lol.

these are all just a few examples. some of it were very honest questions and i'm always more than welcome to spread the truth about Islam. and some of them, as you can see.. was as invitation to a nose-punch. but i can't blame them 100%. the media must have misled them about Islam. but what we can do now is to spread the truth and fix the misunderstandings. let's do that together!

ps/ ya Allah, you made me born into Islam, let me die in Islam. amin.

love always,
ruhil nadiah

Sunday, August 21, 2011

time, treat me well, will you?

i have so little time but so many things to do, so many things to catch up, so many things to reminisce. i'm arranging my limited time to avoid regrets. but at the same time, i wanted time to spend on my own. to walk through memories. i love this place. seriously, i do. for the past three years, i have learned to go through pain and stand up again, learn new things, tolerate the intolerable, love the difference and explore new comfort places. here, i also learned to deal with heartbreak. here, i found the love of my life. here, i befriended nice people whom i called family. here, i get to know Islam in depth. here, i got the strength to do things on my own. here... changed me. physically, emotionally, spiritually in most unique ways. God knows.

yet, life goes on. it changes, just like us. so, i spend my last days in Korea, telling myself that everything will be okay. because there are so many amazing things await me in Malaysia. here, will be one of my best pieces of life and i know Malaysia offers so much more, Insyaallah.

before. three years ago.

oh yeah, few days ago.

*lol. not much different, i guess.

p/s: dear Allah, let me spend my last few days here wisely. time, treat me well, will you?

love always,
ruhil nadiah

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Fattah, come back home, please.

she is more than just a pet. she's a friend, she's a doll, she's my baby and she's my family. i have been taking care of her since birth, since 2004. both of us had a wonderful journey. she always come back home at the end of the day. without fail. but last month, she did not make it home. all of the sudden. i have been missing her, and now that i'm going back home.. i would not be able to see her in front of my door steps. but i'm sure Allah has better place for her. may she be safe, wherever you are. mama miss u, Fattah. come back home, i miss you.

p/s: she's the mummy of all my cats. she is not from the high-breed cats, but she's the best! independent, caring, funny, adventurous, smart and amazing.

elemen-elemen dalam video klip

suddenly it hit me while i'm browsing youtube. i noticed something music videos have in common, in general. i noticed certain elements or patterns. video klip dibawah cume contoh. ade lagi, kene rajin skit je mencari. lol.

1) mesti nak gaduh atau berconflict time-time hujan. lebat plak tu. mungkin kegunaan payung tak dapat impak yang maksima terhadap penonton. kadang2 tu sambil nyanyi kot. nak nyanyi lagi, nak nafas dalam hujan lagi.

2) kalau vokalis pompuan nyanyi dan die berambut panjang, mesti nak ade effect angin. feeling2 windy skit. mase kecik2 suke gak buat depan kipas, tak tahu plak ade effect untuk industri hiburan.

3) lagu hiphop, scene nak kt club mesti ade sorang laki, pastu ade wanita keliling pinggang, budget2 hot. ade minuman kaler2. takpun dalam kereta sport tidak beratap. bawak laju2, ketawa riang nak slow motion.

yang terbaru ni agak horror skit:

4)  buat video klip kat tengah padang jarak padang terkukur. tibe2 tgh2 ade set drum dan sofa. biasenye artis kite suke buat. jenuh jugak nak angkut menatang tu. panas lagi. kental sungguh.

5) ade at one time, orang buat video klip ala2 alam maya. cukup tak gemar. nampak cam nak buat last minute. tampal background je. moyaa. tapi mungkin time tu abes canggih, jadi tak boleh nak salahkan jugak. tengok sudah.

so far, itu je kot yang saya notice. this is not to criticize, but just the things i noticed as an audience. who am i to judge. but at least we can see the patterns, right? macam dah ade certain standards untuk menjayakan video klip plak. art goes beyond border, it doesn't have its limit, so explore and do more (creatively)!

unnamed paintings

few days ago, i had a dinner with my best friend, Juna. we reunited after 13 years. no kidding. at first i thought, the reunion might be awkward since we've been disconnected for so long. but i was glad we managed to fill in the gaps with humors and old stories. and just like that we clicked!

she's an artist. an amazing artist i would describe. she paints with her own elements and create her own world on her canvas painting. she painted from heart and planted mystery in her painting. just like a word-search. it's there but you gotta find it. i saw all of her paintings. she showed my the pictures. i was mesmerized. i'm certainly not an artsy person but hers was different. the paintings were pure.

right now she's working on her paintings to get through exhibition in the galleries. i asked her the titles of some of her paintings but the paintings were unnamed. Juna wanted to let the audience decide for themselves. she wanted the audience to have a personal connection with her paintings. i think it's brilliant.

i wish her well.

this is Juna~

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

kenapa perlu marah-marah?

panas baran. sifat yang cukup huduh. sifat yang huduh ni wujud untuk menguji tahap kesabaran manusia yang tak berape nak sabar ni. asyik2 nak bagi amukan puaka. keluarla segala perkataan dan perbuatan yang huduh. huduh tak? huduh kan?

admit it, you could not tolerate too. every time some people throw their tantrums aimlessly, it looks as if their brain is located at their armpit. no, i'm serious. kenapa perlu marah-marah? come on, pujukla skit kemarahan tu. banyakkan istighfar. amik wuduk ke. takpun, kalo rase nak amuk juga gi duk sudut mane2 sorang2 dan layanlah emosi tu. no one will get hurt kan?

p/s: anger is always followed by stupidity and accompanied by regrets. 

love always,
ruhil nadiah~ 


Ramadan is one of my favorite month. hands down! time nak kumpul2 pahala (dengan ikhlas ye) dan kumpul2 dengan orang tersayang. and yeah, food. heaven. but please not too much. haha. there are lotsa interesting and scientific explanation on the wonders of fasting in Ramadan but i won't go to that. that, we can google. but this will be my own reasons why i like Ramadan:

1) extra prayers. extra deeds. extra everything that is nice will double up! amin~

2) food. time2 ni la rajin nak buat semua jenis menu. but for me, not this time. periuk belanga dah hantar naik kapal. so, perkakas dah takde.

3) healthy diet. selama ni makan je semua bende, penat perut nak proses. rase macam sedap  plak bile perut dah rehat.

4) bulan yang merapatkan silaturrahim. seriously. 'nak buka kat mane?' 'nak tarawih same2 tak?' 'nak sahur ape?' 'jom buka sekali?' lagi ramai, lagi best.

but there's one thing that bothers me about fasting. orang dewasa yang tak puasa tanpa alasan yang kukuh. penat? rokok? lapar? tak tahan? malas? budak tadika yang lembik2 tu pun kental je kot. pregnant mummy pun cube untuk bertahan. this should not happen.
we only restrain ourselves from eating, drinking and other activities, for about 12 hours or so. orang lain tak makan berhari-hari plak. siap tak tahu bile nak buka. tapi kite time berbuka makan macam perut takde dasar, bottomless. so, marilah rasa nikmat puasa, jangan ikut cakap perut. may Allah bless all of the muslims. amin~

p/s: puasa tau!

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

don't cry for me Korea.

it wasn't always like this. but this year, summer in Korea was disturbingly wet. nak pegi mane2 pun susah. kasut basah, baju basah, tudung basah, tangan basah. bertambah plak bile pakai payung saya yang glamour je lebih tapi fail untuk protect saya time hujan. damn. the wet feeling is so annoying and kinda disgusting if you think of all the spit you see on the street. okay, that's utterly disgusting.

of course the rainy days limited most of my favorite activities. nak jalan-jalan termenung, nak shopping2 (duit pun mencurah2 macam hujan), nak lepak2, nak picnic2. but the truth is, even if i feel like staying at home, i like it to be sunny outside. just like the feeling. hujan2 ni boleh mengundang banyak perasaan yang tak diundang. you know what i mean. semua la nak sayu2. mood pun swing swing. and no way i want to blame PMS. sangat overrated.

but come to think of it, it's not fair to blame the rainy days. hujan rahmat kan? takde hujan, complain panas. ade hujan complain, leceh. the trouble is with us, people. maybe if we learn to accept the fact that this summer gonna be rainy all the way, we would not be grumpy. and that is a reminder for me too. Allah tak menyusahkan umat die, kite je suke susahkan diri sendiri and blame everything around us.

p/s: this is out of context, but maybe it rains constantly in Korea because i'm leaving soon. lol. don't cry for me Korea.

lagu untuk time2 hujan. jangan emo kawan2. enjoy la rainy season dengan hati terbuka.

love always,
ruhil nadiah

Monday, August 8, 2011

lagu Ramadan yang klasik.

lagu yang wajib nyanyi dgn mummy
time bulan pose.

love actually.

this is him.
we started as a stranger.
we then turned into friend.
and became more than that.

this is him.
listen but doesn't talk.
care but doesn't show.
love but doesn't lie.

i love him.

my thoughts on drunk people

drunk people pisses me off.
they smell.
they talk crap.
they act like they own the world (of course since they are half-conscious).
and please.. not when they vomit all over the place.
i have experienced meeting various kind of drunk people.
not all bad, of course. but most of them were.
i even met a drunk old man who offered to carry my big heavy luggage.
 thank you, old man.
then, i met the worst. they laughed at me because of my hijab.
vomiting in public places.
shouting in the middle of the night.
if this is not Ramadhan, i already slapped them hard.
but, patience baby.. patience.
i thank Allah, for this beautiful religion which prohibits alcohol.
no fuss. no smell. no vomit. 

Sunday, August 7, 2011

26 and fabulous.

Praise be to Allah. i'm alive and well.
i'm turning 26 this year.
so many things have changed.
i've tasted colorful experiences.
and met so many people and funny personalities.
argued and lost. argued and won.
tears and laughter.
but it has made all my days worth it.
life has been kind to me, i think.
i couldn't ask for more.
and i wouldn't want to wish to be younger.
i like being 26 and i'm enjoying it.
that's why i called it: 26 and fabulous.


honestly, i am not that good with friends. my defensiveness limits me. however, i realize i need them in my life to get me back on the right track. we all need them no matter how much we try to deny it. 
'i can live without friends'
yeah, right. try that and tell me later. see how long can u live in your own island.
life is kinda tough here. being away from family and surrounded by strangers. but friends make it all OKAY. thank you friends. you know who you are. this limited space could never do justice to what all of you have done for me. ruhil loves you.

Ramadhan 2011

once again, Ramadhan is here to be cherished.
let's upgrade our faith
and keep the prayers alive.